Oprah comes out as straight (again), Jodie Foster raps and the world reacts to Rosie's daytime comeback plans

Why does Oprah keep saying she's not gay? Didn't she cover this almost 10 (!) years ago when she appeared on Ellen's "Puppy Episode"? And Lord knows when else ... Anyway, here's a "Money Quote" from Rush & Molloy via Salon.com: Oprah Winfrey apparently addressed rumors about her and "close friend" Gayle King at a recent part for a satellite radio venture: "You know, there are all these rumors about us being gay. We are not gay. If I was gay, I would tell you." I hope that's true, O. I hope that's true. I can tell you from personal experience that falling for your best female friend rocks (unless you kind of, sort of do it in college before you really even have any conscious idea or acknowledgement that you're gay ... but Oprah, you are waaay beyond that).

I don't remember who gave the speech at my college graduation (WSU, class of '89). I mostly remember boredom punctuated by picture posing and hugs. I know Jodie Foster did NOT speak, and if anyone did (I'm sure someone did), they did NOT quote anything resembling popular music. Jodie, however, while speaking to the University of Pennsylvania on Monday, did just that. She ended her speech with her own sort of "rap," more of a poetic spoken word thing, from Eminem's "Lose Yourself." Here's where to hear it:

http://salonmedia.vo.llnwd.net/o1/mp3s/2006/may/foster.mp3

(It's not as lame as it may sound.)

And finally, the lesbian world waits breathlessly for the return of Rosie. The bold prediction is "smackdown city," though I think Rosie will be perhaps more tempered than this:

"On the political level, we'll see showdowns on The View between Rosie the no-nonsense liberal and Elisabeth Hasselbeck the GWB-loving conservative. With Rosie on board, former Survivor contestant Hasselbeck is going to have to contend not only with the liberal opinions of O'Donnell, but also with Rosie's lesbian views, especially her views on gay and lesbian rights and parenting. It's going to get ugly in the way that blue vs. red arguments do. Hasselbeck might discover that she prefers the outback to the out-Rosie.
Ellen? She avoids politics. To her, discussing the country's poli-cultural wars is apparently as enticing as Chlamydia."

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