Art Buchwald, going out like my mom

Diabetes.
Ravaged kidneys.
Dialysis.
An amputated leg.
Depression.
Day after day that begins with the surprise of waking up.

That is the Art Buchwald story, unfolding now in a Washington, D.C., hospice. That was also my mother's story, which ended six years ago in Olympia. Unlike Buchwald, who is 80 as he faces down death with a smile, my mother was only 56 when she died.

She had just had her leg amputated, and after undergoing years of dialysis, which is, at best, exhausting, she decided she'd had enough. She quit getting the treatments, which involve the painful placement of long and thick needles in blood vessels or a "port," usually in the arm. And then she kept on not dying. For weeks. It was odd and in its way wonderful. She, like Buchwald in his last days, was able to break the rules placed on her by dialysis and eat things like pizza and cheesecake and thick, salty, meaty sandwiches from Schlotsky's. She could drink all the fluid she wanted. At times I could almost forget that she was dying. She was like one of those cartoon characters who ran off a cliff, but stayed airborne for a while, on force of will as much as rapidly pumping legs.

But you can only defy gravity for so long. And soon, gravity will come for Buchwald. But how wonderful that he gets to go out his way. As death approached (as in life), Mom had her ups and downs. But ultimately, I think she got some sort of final gratification in making her decision her way.

from the Associated Press:
"I just decided 'To hell with it,'" said Buchwald, seemingly at peace with his imminent fate. . . .
Getting to that point wasn't easy by any means.
"Your loved ones don't like the idea," he said. "Your friends don't like the idea. No one likes the idea, but once I made it, everyone knew it was my choice. They've gone along with it.
"It was purely a decision about 'Did I want to stay around or did I want to go?'" Buchwald said. "It's one of the few things where you have choice."