I wince a little every time I hear someone say "that's so gay." And I've gently tried to educate people I know about how it makes me feel when they use a word that describes me to describe something they find distasteful. It seems like it works, at least when they're around me.
Anyway, I was heartened to hear that I'm not the only one on the case. Wanda Sykes and Hilary Duff are on the case with a new round of PSAs. Sykes' character recently married -- OK, fake-married -- a woman on The New Adventures of Old Christine, and it's not easy to pull off the fake gay marriage thing without seeming like a jerk. But she did it. Anyway, here's the preview. And if you say "that's so gay," listen to Wanda. Knock it off.
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I think you know I'm a very gay-friendly person politically and personally. Yes, gay-friendly is an incredibly corky thing to say but pro-gay seems wrong since I'm really more pro-lifestyle choice. Anywho, I confess that this particular South Park phrase permeated my vocabulary and I've had no luck excising it, despite my awareness it's offsensive, inaccurate, and inappropriate.
While there's a part of me that's resistant to getting too caught up in political correctness, neither do I want to actually hurt the feelings of people I care about. So I guess in the abstract I don't care, but in the specific and personal I do.
So here's a question for you. What's a good, generic replacement word for "gay" here? It seems like almost any generic choice will offend someone. The most likely alternate I can think of is "lame" and I assume that would be offensive to people who limp and such. Similar problem with "dumb."
Sorry if I'm being a literal dork, but I could really use a replacement word that sticks if I'm to get over this bad habit.
I appreciate the thought that went into your comment. And I appreciate your willingness to change what you say. I don't know if I have a replacement word. I'd suggest you go with any word that applies to the situation. Like "bad" or "pathetic." I don't think "lame" or "dumb" are good comparables. Is there anyone who embraces terms like "lame" or "dumb" with pride or celebration? Are those terms ever considered good? To me, using those words makes some sense, as it's a negative word applied to a negative situation. "Gay," to a large number of people, represents a core part of who they are -- and it's not a negative. Despite what some conservative religious groups might think. By the way, I'd go with "gay friendly" if I were you. "Pro-lifestyle choice," to me, seems like you're in favor of things people choose. I didn't choose to be gay, just like I didn't choose to be right-handed or hazel-eyed. I did choose to try to bury my true self and marry a guy, but that was not a lifestyle choice I'd recommend. In fact, that's the kind of marriage that should be illegal: Marriage that you enter into because you're afraid of who you really are.
Food for thought. I'll see what I can do to get my household on the bandwagon.
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